Offlate I am talking to a lot of people in office and outside about what they want to do and how they plan to go about it. Most times people have much dreams and aspirations to make money but not the will to work for it. How can one expect to stay comfortable and still make progress?
It is also foolish when you decide not to let yourself be stagnate or your knowledge be rusted. The ever moving economy and dynamics of work demands one to be on your feet and walking in same stride as with the business needs. Ask not what the company can do for you , but what have you done to help your cause first. If you keep doing the current work best without planning for next step, there would be no change in where you are. Gradually you will be forced to fade into the increasing masses of people like you.
One has to be well read , well informed and prepared to leap into new challenges if you ever wish to make a difference to your own life and living.
There are not many instances that I lose my cool in office. I have cried often when I have performed bad , or felt hurt by some one’s remarks , but never had I replied back in such scenarios. One thing that I absolutely can not let go though is personal insult or allegations. I am not very rigid person but when pitted against some one who only wants to prove his ego the reason for all actions, I have realized I have a bigger ego and stubbornness in such moments , not that I am particularly proud of this.
What I fail to understand and accept is colossal disregard to professional etiquette and more than that , the tendency to NOT follow processes. Processes are there to help people know the best way to deal with any situation and to avoid chaos of any and all kinds. When some one can not respect that , I judge him already. Add to that , the fight to prove himself right in all ways is as much as my flaw , it is unpardonable in people who argue without concern.
I have learned to be gracious and agile with such great effort , and yet breaking that habit becomes a necessity some days. Guess , the lessons are not so much ingrained in me as I thought 😉
Hopefully tomorrow would be a different and better day.
I could so much use some positive vibes to keep my cool next time , I feel like banging my head into a wall or some one who acts like one.
Hope your week going better !
Few people need validations , like I seek from my loved ones. As much I try , I end up slipping into this trap again. Also , I am quite aware of when the praises come from the heart and when they are just hollow words. In one of these phases , I was thinking of few people around me who are of habit of never appreciating any good done by me. Even if I would have saved them from any mess or been there in their times of need, trust these few to never accept it , forget about being thankful. Truth is, I would never stop doing the same for them still, for I love them. Mostly , how I act is how and who I am for everyone , not just my favorite people. So , how does one consulate oneself when struck with narcissistic thoughts of seeking praises from others ? There are indeed few people who will keep making you aware of the good in you , the good you do and that you are special in your own ways. Such are the people you think of and note all the times that you got praises when you least deserved them. Think of the love you are blessed with irrespective of the flaws and feel the universe responding to the validations you seek. It does not come same time , same way but it always comes back. Universe balances it all – the powers vested in it to be fair “most” time , even if delayed !
So trust in Karma , universe , god – say whatever you may. Feel confident in doing good and being good in your actions and thoughts alike. You are loved. You are special.
sometimes I see the signs,
d e p r e s s i o n
spreading slowly around me
one negative thought,
spiraling out of
c o nt r o l ….
the words ready
to pounce, hunt down,
cut open, grab the bones
of reality, the howls;
I see this happening,
I cry within
for you will not ever
accept to have seen
the signs are all there,
help is what we need;
acceptance is never easy
but the journey
to darkness and back
breaks me, but do you feel ?
It is in the blood
the bad one that did not go,
gathering its power
it fed my destructive ego;
darkness falls rapidly
reason unable to fight,
I just need a hand to reach
across the fading patch of night.
The heart has grown
accustomed to love
Cares and kisses some,
Of you,your shadows,
My wings from your hugs.
The mind has grown
In pushing boundaries,
Breaking away my chains,
Burning paths into wild,
Claiming my rightful place.
Another year of my life,
And yet I started living
Only after we met,
Another year crossed off
Merging goods,bads into the best.
Happy birthday to me !
Previous part of the story here
“Quite a perky response, I must say.
I was expecting nothing, to be honest.
Naam to pata chal gaya hoga ..
( You know my name by now, I suppose)
The response popped on her desktop , distracting her for a second. She smiled , Sahil , she thought in her head and went back to work. As the sky outside turned from blue to black and lights came up over her head, she wondered if the morning email needed to be replied. Finally, she thought of not acting like an oddball and giving it some rest. Next morning, there was a new email from Sahil –
It is a notably good morning. I think I saw you in the bus today.
The coffee went cold, as she greedily absorbed his words,his actions,his confusions and the shyness. All this and more of him,she kept filing in her head. The names being called out at the starbucks counter,the conversations on next table,the phone ringing,the constant message beeps;nothing disturbed her today. She was meeting him after an year and even when things had gone silent in head,the stories kept spilling out of her. The moment smelled of black coffee and the color grey.He always managed to make her feel like a child again – trying to impress,narrating the stupidest things,watching him give her all the time and attention he had. She wanted time to know how much she valued his share of stories. Perhaps then she will be able to appear in some of his memories. She smiled, sighed and walked away with mixed emotions.
This was all she could claim of him – the words , the feeling and the inspiration. No picture could evoke the same again.
While Hawkings toiled
on his ideas about time,
going back and forth
on is own thesis,
all theories need
not be believed,
but proved;he opined.
I wonder at existence,
and the magnanimous
personality one must have
to rise beyond daily
routine and pettiness.
Greatness comes with price,
to be focused always
on the goal unknown,
tracing just the path
as and when it shows,
like a wingless flight.
I marvel at dedication
of people who become legends,
and wish their spirits
would bless me similar,
May I never lose hope
no matter where and how I end.
I watched the movie “Theory of everything” today. And over the weekend, I also watched the Dhoni movie. While watching both , the one thought that resonated all through me was the dedication and never to give up. We stray so easily from our own goals, its not even worth boasting. But this weekend , I decided to put some of the thoughts into action and see where my dreams lead me. Since the birthday month also started, I plan to begin the change process right from today. Hope the next year makes me really wiser with age 😉
Will it hurt your ego if I say,
I was trying to lighten the mood?
I do not even know where you are,
just thought to hypothetically check,
how willing are you, if asked for help !
She laughed at her silly attempt at rhyming and sent the email on its way to the stranger’s mailbox. The whole day passed in a blur. Later in the evening , she wrote another poem on the blog , this time about the friendships born out of need of the hour. Before logging out , she checked there were 10 new comments on the blog. Some guy Sahil had commented on all her recent poems. the last comment was on the latest poem –
“Friends in need, often are friends indeed. Even strangers can be well wishers”
Sahil .. She read the name aloud and smiled. The stranger had finally identified himself !
Story part 1
“Damn! What was I thinking” she cursed aloud as soon as she hit the send button on that email. But she was not going to write another email to explain , that was made sure by the call from the security desk. Her cab and gaurd were waiting fir her. She closed her laptop and ran out of the office. The friday had acted like monday but the weekend showed some hopes.
She made sure to hide her office phone over the weekend so she would not feel obliged to check emails or provide any updates on the issues. Monday morning, while in the cab she put the emails to sync and scrolled through to the bottom. The unknown sender has replied ,
Good try. I was not working , and why do you think I would meet strangers when I advised you against it ?
PS: Not that i would mind meeting you to hear your poetry in your own voice
PPS: did you really want to meet ? Just to prove a point ?
This was way out of proprtion, she mused. Time to set some thing straight …
( To be continued tomorrow or till I find a closure )