Well the first song my Ipod made me listen to was “mohabbat ki jhoothi kahani par roye” [ Translation : Cried over the lying tales of love ] .. And though the lyrics are pretty clear with no hidden reference to anything, the lines made me think about the concept of love. A friend last week had argued that unless we love ourself, we can not love any one. And i guess he makes sense now. If I can not love myself, how can I expect some one else to do that same ? My flaws are mine but they are no more than the good I posess. I am lot better that I judge myself [ also lot worse than I think ]. But that’s what and who I am. and always be.
Love does not lie. Love indeed gives you all happiness you seek. And it can give you loads of pain too if you try to decide the source of love and ignore the rest. Friends , family , readers of my blog , people I talk to online and offline , my team mates , any one who makes my day any better becomes my source of Love. And I become the source when I acknowledge the same. And I just love them all a lot. Some of them , I love too much I guess. And it makes me happy just to know such wonderful people.
So If i still want to cry foul that life did not give me a taste of love, well, I am going to make a fool of myself. I am finally prepared to wait for the one person who will come and understand my bonds to others and glue them with his trust and cares. I need no one who wants me to cut away from my network of people just to have a bubble of forced safety. Not again.
My heart is not empty any more to let any one make home there. It neither is full enough not to let worthy people stay in some corners.
I am now running out of both ideas and time , So I stop typing now.
Whatever this might mean to you,
Bless you !
Loved be !
I need to kill boredom,
not that i have nothing else to do
but i still wanted something new;
I ask you for some ideas,
another attempt to make you
speak something;tired to see you mute.
You give me some hard looks
eager to let your imagination
descend into the books you read;
But also aware that will not rest
unless you provide me an object
to keep myself engrossed and busy.
So you send me off to the attic
to search for the grandmom’s album
that no one seen has seen in ages
Am glad i went off at once
without another thought to the task
now that i hold in my hand,the rewards.
This image of her and her sisters
she kept below the pillow on her bed;
i never saw her this happy till the very end.
Will you and me fade the same way
just in each other heart;or will i have
your hands to hold when i beath my last.
I might have been thinking aloud,
’cause you come and hold me close
and whisper in a surreal tone,”love you a lot”.
Inspired from Magpie Tales & 3WW
To let out the pain;
Ease the tension in brain;
Accept my weakness;
Retrieve the strength;’cause
Soon I must overcome it all.
June was the month when i was going through no-joys-all-sorrows phase of year 2010. And being the person i am, i admit i give into disappointments too easily although i do not let them rule my head for long. This post is a reminder of the fact that sorrows do not last, but when you get them as company, do not feel ashamed to be weak at times.
Written for Months of the year challenge – June
a tight clasp creates
we all need our space.
Prompted @ Haiku Heights & Sunday Scribblings
I see a sweet little girl, trying to balance her tiny feet on the sidewalk ; one feet ahead of the next ; holding her fancy dress in her pink fingers. But not for a second do i confuse her with me. I am not her , She is not me. She should not be. Not ’cause i wasn’t this happy and playful when young but ’cause i am not like her today – 20 years later.
I laugh at myself still though knowing well it’s for world’s sake. I curse myself for my mistakes and yet make them again. I live in the pain of lost love and treat it like ecstasy. My words are fueled from the darkness that lurks in my life. The days are brighter than they should be – don’t you know that light turns others blind too ? the nights darker than they could be – i even hide my shadows from myself.
I don’t ever hurt others – its considered a sin ! I betray none, bother none. No one is allowed to love me any more though i seek love from many. I hate just my loneliness as much i enjoy my solitude. I am contradiction that agrees most with my doubts. I am tears in motion, fears that feasts my soul.
I am all this more – And i wonder how i became so ! where is that shy girl gone ! One who loved just herself and laughed on just her own reflection.
And yet you do not need to worry – I stand tall and proud ! Isn’t what the world thinks i am !!
I act what you want to see; I do what you will never like to !
This post was started as prompted at Thursday Tales but the real inspiration came from “Imperfect Prose”. i rarely let my ideas go this way. and am not really sure if i did it well.
Image Source 1 Image Source 2
When love passes by you;
this storm has the fury;
to create its own way;
destroying you as it go
something new or someone dead.
(words by me, image source mentioned below)
I was just there
your thoughts passed by
healing my wounds
that your words left behind.
the oldest marks of rejection
not words,but your thought
moment passing by your day
treat it like your best
This was one of the most random post i wrote here. Taking all prompts at once, letting them mix and compete with each other, and finally penning whatever won the fight in my mind. Please bear with me this week !
(Following image is not my creation. Adding it here since it goes with my sentiments )
Prompted / submitted to OSI , sunday Scribblings , Haiku Heights , 6WS
“Face of faith changed for me”
Faith. The word inspires varies emotions in my heart , mind and soul. Faith on your family not to desert you; on the love you thought will never let you feel low;on the friend you never knew could make you cry so much;on yourself whose real power you never can fathom unless forced to.with every person, it changes its face, meaning and extent of its being between you and the concerned person. Strangely, it never leaves you even when broken. for long you keep searching reasons for its loss, searching for either excuses or ways to hurt it back. so where does this leave us ? when even you can betray the faith you have on yourself, what keeps faith living ? Answer is different to each individual. for me, the faith people instill in me and keep on me keeps me working to preserve it. what keeps your faith safe ?
empty eyes;torn hearts;
faith only let life find place;
Prompted @ Sunday Scribblings & 6 word Saturday
Submitted to OSI and Haiku Heights
my well wisher;
the most dangerous weapon known;
Learn more about the poetry form used i.e the Cinquain here.
Prompted @ OSI and Sunday Scribblings